A Modest Proposal for Translink
Posted by Office-Bob on 16 Jan 2012 | Tagged as: General Craziness
Considering the current state of the world economy, people aren’t very appreciative of hearing that prices are going up, and they’re even less pleased when it’s something as crucial to their needs as travel.
Translink wants to increase fares by 12.5 percent and, of course, the public doesn’t like the idea. Fortunately, any increases will need to be justified before they’re implemented, and consultants are being brought in to look at other ways Translink can reduce operating costs.
“We’re not looking for savings in strings and paper clips,” (Translink Commissioner Martin) Crilly said. “We’re looking for something substantial.”
While I’m not going to get into the wisdom (or lack thereof) in spending money on outside consultants, it seems to me that by focusing only on Translink’s bus fleet, they’re missing an opportunity to increase revenues in another area – fare evasion, which we already know costs Translink a significant amount.
I know Translink is in the process of adding fare gates and turnstiles to SkyTrain stations, and they already have transit police looking for fare evaders, but I want to offer a proposal which I think merits consideration. It involves bringing in those who’ve been marginalized by society and, by giving them a job, helping them to help themselves while providing a tangible benefit to the community.
Ladies and gentlemen, I propose the Urban Rehabilitation System In New Environments program, in which Translink will hire bears to patrol the transit system and look for fare evaders, which the bears would then eat.
Consider the benefits of this plan:
I urge Translink to consider my proposal and have their consultants evaluate it for feasibility and cost-effectiveness.
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